NIGHT OF THE NETHERBAND! (PART ONE: THE FIRST PART)

Pictured: A rival broadcaster phoning the FCC to complain that this program has caused permanent damage to his genius, rendering him unable to finish any of his own projects and capable only of advertising substandard wines and frozen peas

And now, by popular resigned acceptance, I give you the first half of WOW & FLUTTER's most ambitious project to date - NIGHT OF THE NETHERBAND.  

I can't tell you how thrilled I am that this project (or at least this half of it) came off as well as it did, and I owe an unbelievable amount of gratitude to the wonderful, talented friends of mine who somehow made the torrent of overcooked sentences, half-baked concepts, soft-boiled wordplay and culinary-metaphor-not-available neologisms sound like things actual humans would say.  

So, take an audible bow, Mercurochrome Theater On Or Near The Air ensemble (in order of appearance): Bill Honl, Daric Moore, Jessamyn Grace, Karri Gallaugher, Lori Wilson Honl, and Sheila Shaffer.  You're the low-fat non-dairy creamer in my coffee substitute, each and every one of you.  Much love to you all.  (I'd like to single - or double, I guess - out B. Honl and D. Moore in particular; as they were there to participate in the live portions of the program, they were obliged to create characters on the spot out of the vague descriptions I gave them shortly before air, and - because of my typical working method of putting things off until several minutes past the last minute - give on-air cold readings of dialogue that was mostly written WHILE THE SHOW WAS GOING ON.  And, as you can hear, they nailed it.)

Of course, this is still nominally a music show, so there's plenty of excellent if fairly predictable Halloweeny sounds to enjoy as well.  (It's kind of amusing to realize that the Lydia Lunch track, while thematically appropriate, may still qualify as the least scary thing she's ever recorded.)

More to come next week; most if not all of the above will, I hope, return in some capacity, and several more of my dear, dear friends should be joining the troupe for the theoretically-exciting conclusion.  Tune in live at 11:00 Pacific Time, Wednesday, November 4 - locals can twist their knobs to KMUN 91.9 FM Astoria or KTCB 89.5 FM Tillamook; everyone else can dip their cybertoes into the livestream via our website (www.coastradio.org) or, for mobile devices, punch up "Coast Community Radio" on the TuneIn app.  And, naturally, I'll be putting the audio up here soon thereafter if I'm not busy fleeing the country in abject shame.  (I hear Randy Quaid's place up in Canada is available.)

Tolerate!  

Stoically endure!

Enjoy!

PART ONE (PART ONE) - (TT 1:17:57)
0:00:00 - Station I.D./Intro 
0:00:35 - Bela Lugosi's Dead - Bauhaus (short version) (12" single, 1979)
0:00:45 - Bela Lugosi's Dead - Bauhaus (long version) (12" single, 1979)
0:10:16 - Halloween - Japan (Quiet Life, 1979)
0:14:31 - Halloween - The Dream Syndicate (The Days of Wine and Roses, 1982)
0:20:11 - An Unexpected Guest (and His Equally-Unexpected Personal Assistant) Arrive At The Studio
0:28:28 - Monster - Scratch Acid (Scratch Acid EP, 1984)
0:29:44 - An Absurd Laceration - TV Ghost (Mass Dream, 2011)
0:35:09 - Halloween Shindig - Eban Schletter & Mr. Show Cast (Mr. Show with Bob and David, 1998)
0:36:12 - Dusk of the Celestial Fern (1)
0:47:33 - The Host Is Nonplussed By What Just Happened But His Guest Explains Everything (Or... Does He?) (No, No He Doesn't.  But You're Not Supposed To Know That Yet)
0:51:11 - Halloween - Siouxsie and the Banshees (Juju, 1981)
0:54:37 - Look Out, There's a Monster Coming -  Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band (Gorilla, 1967)
0:57:26 - I Was a Teenage Werewolf - the Cramps (Songs the Lord Taught Us, 1980)
1:00:26 - Werewolf Bar Mitzvah - Tracy Morgan/Donald Glover/Jeff Richmond (30 Rock Original Television Soundtrack, 2010)
1:03:15 - The Horror in Clay (incomplete) - Mark E. Smith (The Post Nearly Man, 1998)
1:05:00 - Dusk of the Celestial Fern (2)
1:14:53 - The Guest Quenches The Host's Thirst (Just Not The One For Knowledge)
1:17:57 - End of This Part of This Part

PART ONE (PART TWO) - (TT 44:35)
 
0:00:00 - Count Backwards (Rock & Roll Never Dies) - The Secret History (The World That Never Was, 2010)
0:05:13 - Release the Bats - The Birthday Party (7" single, 1981)
0:07:43 - Spooky - Lydia Lunch (Queen of Siam, 1980)
0:10:17 - The Gory Story of Duane and Debbie - Count Floyd (w/the Wally Hung Trio) (Count Floyd EP, 1982)
0:13:31 - Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps) - David Bowie (Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps), 1980)
0:18:45 - VanDeLusian Abused Cars
0:21:50 - The Terrence Fishman Program
0:25:50 - Lullaby - the Cure (Disintegration, 1989)
0:30:07 - North by Northwest News Headlines
0:33:33 - Three Things Considered
0:39:48 - The Dramatic, Horrifying, and Even-More-Hastily-Written-Than-The-Other-Stuff Cliffhanger
0:43:05 - Closing Credits, As Read By A Person So Focused And Disciplined He Can't Even Get The Name Of His Own Goddamned Project Right
0:44:19 - Old Radio Classics: "Bryce Talmadge - Crimeslapper!" ...And Out